After Pursuing Shizun as My Wife, How Did I End Up the Bottom? - Chapter 1

Chapter 1

When I received Martial Uncle Sect Leader’s summons, I was at the pill furnace giving the Alchemy Elder a hard time.

“There really isn’t a childbearing pill?”

My face was full of disappointment as I muttered under my breath.

“As expected of a cushy internal appointment. Little work, great pay, terrible skills.”

“I’ve been saying hereditary positions don’t work, haven’t I? You can’t even refine this?”

The white-haired old man’s beard nearly flew off in fury. He grabbed a broom and tried to chase me out.

“Get out, get out! Didn’t you hear the sect leader summoned you for questioning? He Qingyi is in seclusion this time. Let’s see who can protect you now!”

I curled my lip, summoned a celestial crane, and hurried toward the main peak.

On the way, I complained to the System: [It has to be that bitch Bai Jin! He can’t beat me, so he’s pulling dirty tricks behind my back.]

The System sounded helpless. [Why do you insist on picking a fight with him?]

I shouted indignantly, [He’s trying to steal my wife! Am I supposed to smile at him?]

What kind of man would that make me?

Where would I put my dignity as a super-macho top?

The other side fell silent for a moment. It was clearly an emotionless mechanical voice, yet somehow I heard a speechless sob in it.

[Where exactly does your confidence come from that you’re the one on top?]

[Do you even need to ask?]

Standing against the wind on the crane’s back, I suavely smoothed my bangs and thumped my chest.

[I, an Innate Demon Seed, hid my identity and joined an immortal sect. In the early stages, I suffer oppression; in the later stages, I darken and fall into demonhood.]

[What a classic super-dominant-top character setup!]

[Now look at my Shizun. Supreme Ice Spiritual Root, cold and otherworldly, keeping strangers at arm’s length-yet after taking me as his disciple, he indulges me to the utmost and gives in to me in every way.]

[What a classic icy, aloof bottom setup!]

[The two of us are simply a pair blessed by time, place, heaven, fate, law, and every natural principle under the sky!]

System: […]

[Your language studies were pretty good.]

[Thank you. Scored 125 on the national college entrance exam.]

I chuckled foolishly, having talked myself into bliss.

Dizzy with delight, I fantasized about my married life with Shizun.

I wished I could drag him to bed today and battle three hundred rounds.

With how fierce I was, I would definitely leave Shizun unable to get out of bed for three days!

Ah!

What bliss! What bliss!

Amid our idle chatter, I arrived at the main hall.

I walked in calmly. Sure enough, Bai Jin was standing in the center with a face swollen like a pig’s head, sobbing and sniffling.

Looking farther up, Martial Uncle Sect Leader’s expression was dark as water. He held a cup of fragrant tea, frowning in deep thought.

A refined gentleman, drinking tea.

When he saw me enter, he slapped the table. The refined gentleman barked furiously, “Ling Feng, someone has accused you of brawling in private and bullying a fellow disciple. Is this true?”

I didn’t argue. “It is true.”

The moment Bai Jin heard that, he jumped up. “He admitted it! Sect Leader, you have to uphold justice for me! Wuwuwuwuwu!”

I shot him a disdainful glance and made a silent comparison in my heart, then scoffed at him.

Sniveling and whining, not a shred of manliness in him. And he thought he was worthy of competing with me for Shizun?

Then I cleared my throat and bowed upward.

“Martial Uncle, this disciple had a reason.”

“Oh?” The refined gentleman stroked his beard and asked in a low voice, “What reason? Speak.”

“He harbored improper intentions toward my Shizun!”

“Nonsense!”

Like a rat whose tail had been stepped on, Bai Jin cried out in shame and anger.

“What proof do you have? If you don’t have any, that’s slander.”

“Of course I have proof! Why else would I hit you? It’s just…”

I pondered, a little hesitant over whether I should say it.

“Don’t be afraid!”

The moment he heard that his precious cabbage at home might have been rooted up by a pig-and was very likely to follow the old path of several previous grand martial uncles, whose back doors had not remained secure-Martial Uncle Sect Leader stopped being refined. He looked at me in a frantic rush.

“There’s no need to hide anything too embarrassing to say. Say it, and Martial Uncle will uphold justice for you.”

You told me to say it.

I cleared my throat and managed my expression.

Then I drew a breath deep into my dantian, grief and indignation filling my face. In that instant, I felt like a young Judge Bao.

I raised a trembling finger toward Bai Jin and shouted,

“He… stole my Shizun’s underpants!”

The cry was soul-stirring and deafening.

Its echoes rang through the great hall, shaking even the disciples guarding the entrance below.

With a clang, the sect leader’s dragon-patterned celadon teacup fell to the floor.

Eldest Senior Brother, who had been standing in attendance at the side, raised an eyebrow. His thoughtful gaze circled between Bai Jin and me.

Bai Jin’s boiled-pork pig head turned into a braised-pork pig head.

Flustered and furious, he said, “You… how did you know?”

I spat in rage and contempt.

“Pah! I have no obligation to tell you!”

Then I declared with righteous fervor, “You pervert. You committed such a lewd and shameful act, and you still have the face to ask?”

How did I know?

Because of course I went too.

I just hadn’t expected this brat to get there first and steal the initiative from me.

With awe-inspiring righteousness, I was extremely dissatisfied.

Shizun only had so many pairs of underpants. If he stole them, what was I supposed to steal?

He really deserved that beating.