Help! My Bargain-Buy Crybaby Merman Won’t Stop Making Noise - Chapter 2
That was it?
With no other choice, I contacted customer service and sent them my order number.
They answered almost immediately.
【Hi, dear customer! As stated on the product page, this is a clearance item. He refuses to sing, communicate, or produce pearls. He has an antisocial temperament and is recommended only as a budget bed partner.
【We do not accept returns on the grounds that he will not sing or produce pearls.】
I typed back:
【The merman scratched me.
【Do I need to worry about a Vibrio vulnificus infection?】
Customer service replied:
【Don’t worry, dear customer. All our merfolk have been treated.】
After a moment’s thought, I asked another question.
【I offered him salmon, but he won’t eat it. Does he have any dietary preferences?】
【In theory, dear customer, merfolk can eat anything humans eat.
【He may be unsettled by his new environment, or he may simply not be familiar with you yet.】
Not familiar? Or did they mean the food wasn’t cooked enough?
Merfolk ate their food cooked?
Then what did wild merfolk do? Did savages grill it for them?
Confused though I was, I accepted the answer and followed up.
【How well done should it be?】
There was a pause before customer service replied.
【Xiaoxiao thinks medium rare should be fine, dear customer.】
Good grief. Apparently, the savages had to know how to cook salmon medium rare.
【Who’s Xiaoxiao? Some kind of expert?】 I asked.
【Xiaoxiao is me, dear customer. (Finger heart)】
I couldn’t find a tutorial online for cooking salmon medium rare, so I gave it a quick sear and declared it arbitrarily rare.
At the pool, I picked up a piece with my chopsticks and ate it in front of him.
“It’s edible,” I said.
He stopped before me, the waterline level with his collarbones. His gaze lowered, droplets still clinging to his lashes, and he slowly lifted both hands out of the water.
Only then did I see what rested in his palms.
My bracelet.
He had recovered every single bead.
He placed it in my hand and gave me a sweet, obedient smile.
He looked like a completely different fish from the one who had attacked me.
So Xiaoxiao had been right after all, I thought.
He really did like medium-rare salmon.
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