I Am the Chief of the Imperial Bedchamber - Chapter 1

Chapter 1

The transmigration System bound itself to the wrong person.

As compensation, it promised to give me an impressive, illustrious identity in ancient times.

Full of anticipation, I asked, “A commandery princess? A princess? Some noble young lady?”

It scoffed. “You call that impressive?”

My eyes lit up. “A general? A marquis? Or a prince?”

It said haughtily, “You call that illustrious?”

“D-don’t tell me…” I was so excited I could barely speak. “The emperor?!”

It coughed twice. “Close. If anything, even better.”

Then it revealed the answer.

“Chief of the Imperial Bedchamber, known to all as Nanny Chicken. Even the emperor’s third leg is under your control. Impressive, right?”

Me: ???

Impressive, my ass!!!

And so, in a not particularly glorious fashion, I became Chief of the Imperial Bedchamber.

The good news was that people actually called me Nanny Ji, not Nanny Chicken.

The bad news was that the latter did a much better job of summing up my duties.

At the first watch, when even the chickens were drowsy, the emperor said, “Nanny Ji, bring her in.”

At the second watch, when even the chickens were exhausted, the emperor said, “Nanny Ji, send her away.”

At the fifth watch, when the chickens woke up, the emperor said, “Nanny Ji, send someone else tonight.”

I stayed up until my eyes went dead, thinking that, in the end, the emperor and a rooster weren’t all that different.

And I, stuck on the night shift, was worse off than a chicken.

The System asked, “So? Doesn’t it feel like you hold great power?”

I thought about it. “Not that great.”

“Fine.” It knew it was in the wrong. “But I can help you climb higher. I’ll cut through every thorn, remove every obstacle, and guarantee that you’ll become the Old Emperor’s most trusted Chief of the Imperial Bedchamber!”

“How is that any different from now?”

“He’ll respectfully call you Old Ji.”

“…”

The System said awkwardly, “Then what do you want?”

“Brother System, I just want to go home.”

“It’s not like there’s no way.” In great pain, it agreed. “I can help you take a back door, but you need to prepare ten thousand taels of silver.”

Ten thousand taels wasn’t hard to earn in the palace, but the original owner of this body was twenty-four, and in one year she was supposed to be released from the palace.

I had to make some quick money.

Holding such an important post in the Office of Respectful Affairs, earning a little extra on the side was simple.

There were always favored or unfavored consorts who would slip me some silver from time to time, asking me to look at the dates and find a way to arrange for the emperor to serve them.

Oh, no. For them to serve the emperor.

But the Old Emperor wasn’t exactly marketable. Selling one night with him wouldn’t bring in much profit, which made it hard for me to go home early.

So I found a new path. In an unprecedented move, I began auctioning off specific dates to jack up the price of this old pig.

Ladies!

The first and fifteenth of the month, the Empress of the Central Palace’s days-if you can snatch those, isn’t that a flex?

New Year’s Day, Mid-Autumn Festival-a nation’s emperor, washed clean and keeping you company for the holiday. Isn’t that fashionable?

Sure enough, the ladies’ enthusiasm for bidding rose by quite a bit. Even if they couldn’t sleep with him themselves, they couldn’t just let someone else get the bargain.

As a result, the final prices became wildly inflated. I had fewer days to tamper with, but I earned even more money.

However, while my purse was gradually bulging, even the best horse could stumble.

The newly favored Consort Yu didn’t follow the rules and won seven days in a row.

I advised her, “Your Ladyship, if you’re eating the meat, you should at least let the others have a sip of soup.”

Consort Yu was basking in her success. “Whether I spend this money or not, His Majesty will turn over my name tablet. Now that I’m letting you make a profit, is that still not enough to shut your mouth?”

Well, weren’t we confident.