I Won't Leave You, Jinchao - Chapter 1

I seemed to have transmigrated.

Into the matriarchal smut novel I’d been reading before bed, at that.

And I was cannon fodder.

This body’s original owner was named Zhang Zhiyi. The man beneath me was her secondary husband, Xie Jinchao.

She treated him like something less than human, beating and berating him at the slightest excuse.

Then she would force him to do things in bed.

Later, chasing ever greater thrills, she actually invited other people to join her. The humiliation finally drove Xie Jinchao to snap. He stabbed her and her so-called friends to death.

From then on, he wanted nothing to do with love. He even loathed sex, making him a rare breath of fresh air in this trashy book.

He eventually grew into the villain, constantly making trouble for the heroine and her men.

You smut characters really did get up to everything.

But what was I supposed to do now?

I eased off the bed and flung away the short whip that had fallen beside it.

Xie Jinchao shrank back slightly. “My lady, have I displeased you?”

His eyes shone with tears, but he didn’t dare cry.

Who could look at him like that and not feel a flutter?

Me. I was too scared of dying. “N-no. Don’t be afraid.”

I kept my voice as soft as I could, afraid of frightening him.

Looking down, I saw red welts crisscrossing the skin exposed beneath his clothes. Presumably the work of that whip.

I was a monster.

No! The original owner was a monster!

I went out and asked a maid to bring some wound salve, then took it back into the room.

Xie Jinchao had put his inner robe back on and was sitting blankly on the bed.

He looked so sweet.

I walked over and gave the jar of salve a little shake. “Take that off. I’ll put some medicine on you.”

Flustered, he rose to take it from me. “M-my lady, I can do it myself.”

I hurried to push him back down. He was so tall I almost couldn’t manage it.

“It’s fine. Just lie down.”

Xie Jinchao lay back and turned his face aside, burying it in the bedding.

I dabbed salve onto a fingertip and spread it over the welts.

The cool ointment made him shiver. A sound escaped him before he could stop it.

At that sound, I stiffened too.

Something in my memories began to overlap with the scene before me.

I suddenly remembered that the original owner had done this as well. She would cover him in welts, then pretend to be gentle while applying medicine.

Only, as she went on applying it, her hands would wander elsewhere.

She would also deliberately keep pressing her fingers into his injuries.

Oh my god. Was there no limit to how messed up this smut could get?

No wonder he’d been so reluctant to let me treat him.

I didn’t want to remember any more. I hurriedly finished applying the salve and left with the jar. “Get some rest.”

Only once I was outside could I breathe again.

Time to get my thoughts straight. The heroine was the Second Princess; this body’s original owner was the Third Princess, the most favored of them all.

The Second Princess cared about the realm. Despite keeping a courtyard full of beautiful men and doing unspeakable things with them every day, she was remarkably good at governing.

I had to hand it to her. A heroine was a heroine. Where did she find the energy?

Favored by the Empress, the original owner had once been a leading contender for the throne. Unfortunately, she was so reckless and self-indulgent that she was utterly unfit for the job.

And she ended up getting stabbed by Xie Jinchao anyway.

In the book, Xie Jinchao was the son of a minister and one of her lesser husbands. Unwanted at home, he’d caught the original owner’s eye six months ago. Taken with his beauty, she’d forced him into her household as a concubine.

He was currently the only man in the Princess’s residence. Though only a secondary husband, he was treated with a measure of respect by the servants.

His sole source of misery here was the original owner.

Great. A bright future ahead of me.

I had no idea why I’d ended up in a novel. For now, all I could do was take things one step at a time.

Lost in thought, I wandered around the courtyard. Then voices reached me.

“Young lady, don’t. I…”

“Why act so innocent? Weren’t you the one seducing me?” A woman’s breathless voice came from behind the rockery.

I’d only come out for a walk!

I really didn’t want to watch a live sex show. In a panic, I fled back to the room.

I needed a drink of water to settle my nerves.

I failed to notice the figure curled on the bed trembling slightly after I returned.

Xie Jinchao was lying down. He ought to be asleep already.

I edged toward the bed.

He was the original owner’s only man, and she slept beside him every night. Besides, the bed was enormous. Surely I could have one little corner.

Taking off my outer robe, I quietly lifted an edge of the quilt and slipped underneath.

In the dim candlelight, sleep crept over me.

Then something touched my waist. It tickled.

I opened my eyes drowsily to find Xie Jinchao kneeling astride me.

That woke me up instantly.

His face flushed, he said obediently, “Let me serve you, my lady.”

He reached to undo my clothes.

Submissive as he looked, I could tell he was forcing himself to endure the humiliation.

I caught his hands at once. “N-no need. It’s late. Let’s get some sleep.”

He looked at me in surprise. Remembering his past torment, he secretly let out a breath of relief.

But a moment later, as though another thought had occurred to him, his face went deathly pale.

Had his wounds gotten worse?

I scrambled up to check, tugging at his sleeve. “What’s wrong? Do your injuries hurt again?”

He stared at my anxious face, looking lost. After a moment, he spoke faintly.

“If you don’t want me to serve you, have I displeased you? Are… are you going to have me…”

His voice caught, and tears began spilling down his face.

I remembered the original owner forcing him to serve her, making him do all sorts of things without a shred of decency. Whenever she wasn’t pleased, she threatened to sell him off.

As a minister’s son, even one born to a lesser husband, he should never have been reduced to this.

But the minister’s household knew the princess had taken him on a whim and didn’t care about him at all. They treated him as nothing more than a means of gaining influence. And with the original owner’s complete lack of restraint, she might really have done something as outrageous as selling him.

I slowly lifted a hand and wiped his tears away. He stared at me, and I quietly held his gaze.

“I won’t.”

Looking straight into his eyes, I said, “I behaved terribly before. It won’t happen again.”

At the disbelief in his eyes, I smiled. “You’re going back to the Xie residence tomorrow. How about I come with you?”

“My lady… you’ll come with me?”

He could hardly believe it. In the six months since he’d married into my household, his wife had never once gone home with him.

Besides, as a secondary husband, he had no right to ask it of her.

Watching him think, I decided to give him some advance warning. I was absolutely not going to behave like the original owner.

I took his hand and made him a solemn promise.

“Of course I’ll come. I’ve wronged you in so many ways. From now on, I’m going to change.”