Side Effects of a Love Gu - Chapter 3

After the get-together, we returned to campus.

I started deliberately keeping my distance from Luosang.

But he was acting strangely. He clung to me even more than before.

He had to sit across from me in the dining hall, squeeze in beside me when I studied in the library, and follow me even when I went to fill my bottle with hot water.

The worst was showering.

The communal bathhouse had separate men’s and women’s sections, but somehow he always happened to arrive at the entrance at the same time I did.

“What a coincidence, Rourou.”

It always felt a little odd, but he looked so innocent and sincere that I didn’t question it.

And while I showered, I kept feeling as if he were watching me.

As though those green eyes could pass through the wall and the drifting steam to stare at the marks on my waist and stomach.

Fingerprints and kiss marks he’d left, some deeper than others, tinged an intimate pink.

Maybe I was losing my mind.

For this morning’s class, I slipped into the lecture hall twenty minutes early and picked a seat in the back corner, against the wall.

I’d barely opened my book before the chair beside me was pulled out.

Luosang sat down, his knee against mine.

He wore a baseball cap pulled so low it hid almost half his face.

He looked particularly worn out. The jade earring hanging from his ear seemed to have lost its shine. The dark circles beneath his eyes were impossible to hide, and his lips looked pale and dry, a little cracked.

He was like a flower wilted by frost, drooping and yet still painfully beautiful.

Poison alert!

I grabbed my bag to change seats.

Luosang suddenly caught my sleeve.

His grip was so light I could have pulled free with one tug.

But I didn’t. I waited for him to speak.

“Chen Rourou.” His voice was a little hoarse, thick and plaintive. “I’m scared. Do you think I’m dirty now? Is that why you don’t want me around?”

I looked down at him.

His lashes trembled, a thin sheen of tears gathering in his green eyes. He looked anxious and utterly miserable.

He continued in that muffled voice, getting quieter and quieter.

“I’m really scared you’ll look down on me. You’re my only girl… friend.”

[Oh, Luo, you fool. Asking the culprit for help. You’re practically begging to get hurt.]

[She’s horrible. Look what she’s done to him!]

[To be fair, she has plenty of marks too. She’s practically a cream-filled puff now. I counted that night—at least seven fingerprints on her waist, and bite marks on her ass.]

[Yeah, and her life is in danger.]

I wasn’t reading the comments.

I was looking at Luosang’s face, and suddenly it made sense.

From his perspective, he’d been dragged into a hotel for no apparent reason, then ended up in bed with someone he didn’t know.

He’d woken up covered in marks—fingerprints, kisses, bites—so many it looked as if someone had chewed him all over.

And he didn’t even know who.

He felt dirty. He felt rejected by the entire world.

He hadn’t come to me because he suspected me.

He was afraid.

To him, I was the only person in our class who’d ever been kind to him.

That was why he’d still come back to me, even after the awful things I’d said that day.

Oh, well.

He was a victim too.

I sighed, put my bag back on the desk, and sat down again.

Looking down, I said, “No. I thought you might want some time alone. That’s why I’ve been keeping my distance.”

He blinked. The moisture slowly receded from his eyes. “Really?”

“Really.”

The corners of his mouth curved up a little. “Thank goodness. Chen Rourou, you’re such a good person.”

I’d just been handed the “you’re such a good person” line, and I was delighted.

He paused, then leaned closer until his nose almost brushed my earlobe.

“Then… can I cuddle up to you?”

I froze. “Huh? To me? Why? A man and a woman can’t just get handsy like that.”

He lowered his eyes, his ears a little red.

“I mean I want to be close to you. It would make me feel better, because I’d still have someone to lean on. Knowing you don’t think I’m disgusting would help.”

I opened my mouth, but didn’t refuse.

I had the odd feeling I was being wrapped around someone’s little finger.

Luosang pressed closer, shoulder to shoulder, thigh to thigh.

His breath brushed softly against me.

My heart skipped.

We were much too close.

The instructor glanced our way several times, adjusted his glasses, looked again, then finally gave a pointed cough.

I held my pen, my ears burning so fiercely that even my neck was red.

My skin tingled unbearably.

[What are they DOING? My eyes. Classroom play, is it?]

[Please. Luo is just using her. She’s a tool, that’s all. Don’t read into it. (No idea what kind of tool, though.)]

[He’s testing her. Once he’s done, he’ll kick her aside. Don’t get your hopes up.]

[But… why does it look like he’s actually being clingy? His ears are so red they could drip blood. Surely nobody acts THAT well.]

[Help, the teacher’s face has gone green. Good luck, girl. You’re probably failing this class.]

I pretended I couldn’t see the comments. Pretended I hadn’t noticed the instructor’s looks.

…Because when Luosang leaned into me, I didn’t want to push him away.