The Beautiful Top Is Always Playing Innocent - Chapter 1

After my rebirth, my best bird-friend mistook me for dead and buried me.

He gave me a grand funeral. The suona horn at my grave blared loud enough to shake the heavens.

Through the thick coffin, I heard my dear bird-friend wailing, “Qing Yan! Oh, Qing Yan! How could you leave us like this?”

“How am I supposed to live all alone now? Boohoohoo!”

“Don’t stop me! Let me die with him—”

He delivered those cries with such feeling that my skull rang, as if several dozen water buffalo were dancing on my temples.

I struggled out of the black ashes and saw him sobbing while fondling the chest of the handsome man beside him.

Son of a bird.

I knew there had to be something fishy about all that grief.

He was flirting with a man at my grave!

You beauty-obsessed disgrace to birdkind!

“I’m not dead!” I shouted furiously. “Don’t put the lid on yet!”

What emerged was only a feeble chirp.

I looked down in horror and found two tender yellow feet. Even with all my strength, I couldn’t jump as high as the coffin wall.

Me: “…”

Apparently, when a bird was weak enough, even a desperate struggle looked like a grasshopper flailing.

I watched helplessly as my bird-friend wept himself unconscious. I stretched out a claw to stop him, but with too much force and too little body, I did the splits and landed flat on my rump.

Then the coffin lid came down.

I raised my beak to the heavens and wailed, “Cheep—!”

Somebirdy save me, cheep!

This bird is going to die, cheep!

Cheep, cheep, cheep!

Ever since the spiritual energy of the mortal realm had thinned, I was the first phoenix in a thousand years to be born naturally.

As the phoenix clan’s sole heir, I naturally had the grandest temple, the richest incense offerings, and the most worshippers.

And the sturdiest coffin.

I had already spent a full day hammering my beak against the wood—knock, knock, knock—and hadn’t made so much as a pinhole!

Furious, I plopped onto my backside, stuck both feet in the air, and kicked uselessly. “Open! Open for me!”

The coffin shuddered.

Me: “?”

That actually worked?

I kicked again. “Open!”

Clang—!

With an enormous crash, the lid flew off.

Heavens above, this bird could finally see the sky again.

Tears of joy in my eyes, I prepared to race toward freedom and light.

A hand reached inside.

I.

A mighty phoenix.

The glory of all birdkind.

Was pinched up between two fingers!

The humiliation!

I glared wrathfully—

“I thought the corpse had risen. Turns out some silly little thing fell inside.”

“Look at those big round eyes.”

“Here, cutie. Tsk, tsk, tsk.”

Me: “?” Was he calling a dog?

Had he never heard of a wrathful glare?

Well? Had he?!

Answer me!

You uncultured grave robber!

The grave robber said, “What’s all that cheeping supposed to mean? You’re awfully cute.”

Me: “…”

The grave robber tossed me into the air.

Black smoke exploded around him. A dragon’s roar rang out, and I landed on the back of an enormous jet-black dragon.

Me: “?”

Was employment really this bad nowadays?

Had even dragons taken up grave robbing?

Before I could think further, the black dragon shot into the sky. I clung desperately to his two whiskers. “Cheep, cheep, cheep!”

Slow doooown!

But the dragon flew like a dog off its leash, entirely unconcerned with whether I lived or died.

By the time he landed, every feather on my body had been blasted upright.

He only laughed. “Hahaha! A rainbow dumpling.”

Just you wait.

Once I regained my true form, I would bring a cartload of bird-friends to deal with him.

The black dragon called out, and two young men emerged.

Dragons always wore masks in public, so no outsider knew their true faces.

Certain they couldn’t understand bird speech, I grumbled loudly, “They must wear masks because they’re ugly.”

“Hmph. Ugly and bad-tempered.”

“No wonder nobody likes you.”

“Unlike me. My admirers could circle the Celestial Court fifteen times.”

I raised my head proudly and cast the newcomers a half-lidded glance, ready to commit a minor sin by judging their looks.

Then I saw their faces, and every poisonous word lodged in my throat.

Sweet heavens above.

Why had no one told me dragons looked this good?

I jerked my head toward the grave-robbing dragon.

He had removed his mask as well. His gentle eyes narrowed with amusement. “What are you staring at, rainbow dumpling?”

The other two beautiful young men crowded closer.

Three devastatingly authoritative faces appeared before me at once.

To the left, the eldest dragon brother: shapely, voluptuous, a born seductress.

To the right, the second: bedroom eyes, delicate and sweet.

Straight ahead, the third: coy, enchanting, beautiful as a celestial maiden.

I slapped my thigh.

Well, wasn’t this embarrassing?

What grave-robbing dragon?

These were beauties delivering themselves to my door.

How could I have misunderstood them so badly?

I crossed one foot over the other, gave a frail little cheep, and collapsed.

This bird was so weak.

Only a beauty’s embrace could get me back on my feet.

A coquettish little bird lived the best life.

Just as I wished, I made my home with the dragon clan.

Every morning, I woke in my hundred-square-meter golden nest, trod across layer upon layer of soft merfolk gauze, and groomed my feathers atop a Chinese parasol tree decorated in pure gold.

Then a handsome dragon would come feed me.

Once I had eaten my fill, I selected whichever body pleased me most, curled up on his chest, and went back to sleep.

Now this was how one ought to live after rebirth.

Farewell, my dearest bird-friend.

The dragon clan was my true home now.