The Four-Sided Table of Human Bustle - Chapter 3

Chapter 3

The three of them slept on the kang together for three days.

I slept up there too, but I was pressed up against the wall. The three of them shared one quilt, I had one to myself, and there was another quilt between us.

On the first night, I said I was sleeping there too and told them to squeeze in, not snore, and mind their sleeping posture.

The three grown men stared at me, dumbstruck, their jaws practically hitting the kang in unison.

Hua Lian said, “How can that possibly be allowed? What if you harbor improper designs on me in the middle of the night? Wouldn’t my innocence be ruined?”

Me, Tu Li, Wu Muqing: …

Tu Li said, “This is inappropriate. If you sleep here, the three of us will sleep on the floor.”

Wu Muqing said, “Indeed, Miss Chi Yuan. This would damage a lady’s reputation. The three of us can simply sleep on the ground.”

I said, “The four of us aren’t even the same species, so let’s not get too hung up on gender. I don’t plan on marrying in this lifetime anyway, and reputation isn’t as important as staying alive. The mountain nights are cold. You’re all badly injured and shouldn’t catch a chill, and I don’t want to keep carrying you back and forth either. If you’re uncomfortable, I’ll sleep on the floor.”

As I spoke, I picked up my bedding and prepared to bid farewell to the warm, toasty kang.

All three of them immediately pressed down on my bedding, their faces flushed as they said nothing.

I felt that these three grown men looked mighty and imposing on the outside, but were actually fussy and dithering, not even as straightforward as eighty-year-old Granny Wang at the village entrance.

I sighed. “All right, I’ll tell you the truth. I don’t care whether you’re demons, devils, immortals, or even ghosts. If one shows up, I’ll treat him like a sister too. I’ve spent the whole day carrying the three of you back and forth, and I’m pretty tired. Can we rest earlier now? I still have to go up the mountain to chop firewood tomorrow morning.”

The three of them nodded and, one after another, let go with reddened faces.

Hua Lian raised his hand. “Chi Yuan, I’ll sleep next to you. Those two don’t look like good people at first glance. They look all serious and righteous, but who knows how many dirty thoughts they’re hiding? I don’t snore, I’m well-behaved when I sleep, and smell me, I even smell nice.”

Me, Tu Li, Wu Muqing: …

Tu Li sneered. “Weren’t you afraid she’d harbor improper designs on you in the middle of the night?”

Wu Muqing chuckled. “Weren’t you afraid your innocence would be ruined?”

I leaned in and sniffed him. “You do smell pretty nice. Even better than the Eldest Miss of the Xue Family in town. You’ll do.”

Hua Lian stared wide-eyed as I drew back from his collar, his face red all the way down to the base of his neck, both hands twisting the hem of his coarse cloth robe.

“You absolutely must not fall in love with me. Let me make this clear first: I don’t date women uglier than me. But… if you absolutely insist on clinging to me no matter what, I… I suppose I could… compromise a tiny bit.”

Me, Tu Li, Wu Muqing: …

I patted him on the head and said earnestly, “Go to sleep early. Maybe your brain will grow a little.”