The High God Insists on Marrying Me - Chapter 1

Once, when I could no longer afford to stay alive, I sold myself to a High God.

Embarrassing, I know. A Demon Lord reduced to selling himself out of poverty—and to a god, at that.

Which was why I wore my friend’s face when I did it.

He was a High God too, though he rarely ventured out. He was usually either fawning over someone he fancied or on his way to do so.

Since it wasn’t my own face I was disgracing, I made my bargain-basement sales pitch as shameless as possible.

“Efficient worker. Easy to boss around. Can also warm your bed.”

Never in my wildest dreams did I imagine that the Vermilion Bird, High God and Lord of the Upper Heavenly Realm’s southern domain, could look so proper and respectable while being so utterly improper in private.

Of all the qualities I listed when he bought me, he heard precisely one: the last.

Once we reached Vermilion Bird Palace, he looked at me expectantly. “Tiger, you’ve come a long way. You can warm beds now?”

What?

Only then did it hit me. Of course the leaders of the four ancient divine clans knew one another.

Back in the primordial age, they had fought alongside Sovereign Chenyang across the length and breadth of the world, establishing order in heaven and earth.

Put simply, they’d beaten up my ancestors together.

True, they seldom gathered after Sovereign Chenyang passed away over ten thousand years ago. That didn’t mean they’d forgotten one another’s faces.

Poverty had robbed this demon of common sense.

Regret was useless now. I could only hope White Tiger wouldn’t demolish my Demon Realm once he was done chasing his beloved.

Luckily, I wasn’t one to dwell.

I doubled down on my shamelessness. “Pay extra and you can unlock more skills.”

Generally speaking, I was a Demon Lord of principle. Unless someone paid me to adopt a different principle.

Vermilion Bird happened to possess a great many of my principles. With a sweep of his great wing, he said, “Fine. Anything you take a liking to in my southern domain is yours.”

The finest customer in all Six Realms.

Well, I wasn’t going to stand on ceremony.

Without a moment’s hesitation, I helped myself, in White Tiger’s name, to countless immortal pills, emptied ten of his gold mines, and… after getting drunk, took my greedy indulgence far enough to drain his body too.

What I hadn’t expected was that a High God could be so frail. After I’d exhausted him, he suddenly coughed up blood.

By the time I realized I might have caused a problem, it was too late. Vermilion Bird had no choice but to seal his senses and enter seclusion.

I fled that very night. One second’s delay, I feared, and the gods would come to settle the score.

After all, according to my prickly half-master, the demons’ Grand Elder, Vermilion Bird was the most precious bird—sorry, High God—among the gods.

During the primordial wars, his entire clan had fallen fighting alongside Sovereign Chenyang. He was the unhatched orphan egg they had entrusted to the Sovereign.

The last of his kind, in all heaven and earth.

Before Sovereign Chenyang died, Vermilion Bird could do whatever he pleased among the gods. Any treasure in the Six Realms was his for the asking. Had he wanted the Heavenly Emperor’s dragon horns, the Emperor would have had to pull them off and hand them over.

After Chenyang’s death, even the Heavenly Emperor treated him with deference. They might as well have hung a sign over his southern domain: RARE SPECIES. DO NOT CAPTURE. OFFENDERS WILL BE BEATEN TO DEATH.

That made him the wealthiest High God of all, which was one reason I’d chosen him as my mark.

I still remembered the Grand Elder teaching me about the gods when I was little. He’d made a particular point of discussing Vermilion Bird.

I was barely a hundred then, rather distractible, and a bird outside the Demon Palace caught my attention.

The Grand Elder turned my face back with his hand. “Cang Jue, what’s so interesting about that bird? It hasn’t half Vermilion Bird’s looks.”

I had nothing to say to that.

Actually, I couldn’t help asking, “Grand Elder, this lesson lasts four hours. You’ve spent three of them talking about how beautiful Vermilion Bird is. Be honest. Have you got a crush on him?”

His expression froze.

I encouraged him. “Gods and demons may be different, but this isn’t the primordial age anymore. We can marry one another now, and people don’t mind men loving men nearly as much. If you really like him, I could go to heaven and propose a match for you. How about it?”

His expression froze harder.

Thinking he feared rejection, I pressed on. “Sure, you’re only a crow, but you’re still a bird. Besides, Vermilion Bird has nothing but his looks. You’re a divine bird who can foretell good fortune and disaster. Show him what you can do. He’ll fall for you, guaranteed.”

I considered it. “Even if he turns you down, at least you can move on. Better than pining forever like this.”

His face had gone completely rigid.

After a long pause, he snapped his sleeve angrily. “I’m telling you this because protecting rare species is the duty of gods and demons alike. As Demon Lord, you should be setting an example by looking after him!”

Right.

Who knew he cared so much about the balance of nature?

I secretly rolled my eyes at him.

Never mind the long-standing animosity between gods and demons. Vermilion Bird was the gods’ precious darling. Surely it wasn’t our job to look after him.

And besides—

“But Grand Elder, you’ve spent the whole lesson talking about his looks. You need to stay on topic.”

He looked a little like he wanted to beat me to death.