The Stepmother Who Stayed - Chapter 3

My son’s name was Su Chengsi. His pet name was Afu.

Father chose his name. He wanted him to carry on the Su family line.

I’d objected at first, but Father said, “When you marry into the marquis’s household, your children will be Qis. Who will carry on our line? Afu will be a Su. He’ll belong to our family and inherit the business.”

That seemed reasonable, so I agreed.

And so Afu’s surname was Su, not Qi.

He wasn’t really a child of the marquis’s household. He was the burden I’d brought with me.

Everyone in the house knew it, but nobody dared say anything.

After all, Father had donated five thousand taels of silver to the court for the river embankments. That was enough to keep this household fed for years.

Afu’s pet name meant good fortune, and it suited him. He was round, fair, and soft, like a little ball of sticky rice.

He’d always been timid. Strangers, loud noises, darkness, thunder—there was a whole list of things that frightened him.

When we first boarded the boat, he was afraid of the water. He hid in the cabin for three days.

Once he grew used to it, he spent every day at the window watching the fish. “Mother, do fishies sleep?”

“Yes.”

“Do fishies dream?”

“I don’t know.”

“What do fishies dream about?”

“Turning into birds and flying in the sky.”

He thought about that for ages. “What do birds dream about, then?”

By then I was tired of the questions. “Turning into fish and swimming in the water.”

Understanding dawned on him. “Oh! They take turns dreaming!”

Taoxi laughed so hard she doubled over.

Now Afu stood behind me, gripping my skirt, half his head peeking out as he watched the three strangers opposite him.

Qi Ruoyu came over, crouched, and asked gently, “Little one, what’s your name?”

Afu didn’t answer. His head disappeared behind me.

Qi Ruolan leaned closer. “Are you Afu? I heard your mother call you that.”

Still no answer.

Qi Zhao, standing right at the back, suddenly spoke. “He’s scared.”

His voice was small and soft, with a note of caution.

I looked down at him.

His face reddened under my gaze, and he took another step back.

“How do you know?” I asked.

“I can tell,” he whispered.

I studied him without speaking.

He was eight, yet so small and thin that he was hardly taller than Afu.

He wasn’t an ugly child. In fact, he was quite handsome, with delicate, clear-cut features. He was simply much too thin, like a bean sprout.

His robe looked fairly new, but on closer inspection the sleeves were short, leaving a strip of wrist exposed.

The capital was still cold at this time of year. Wasn’t he freezing in that?

While I was thinking, Afu suddenly poked his head out and asked Qi Zhao, “Are you scared?”

Qi Zhao blinked.

“I’m scared,” Afu said. “Are you?”

Qi Zhao thought for a moment, then nodded. “I’m scared too.”

Afu came out from behind my skirt and went up to him, tilting his face upward. “What are you scared of?”

“Lots of things,” Qi Zhao said quietly.

“Me too. Thunder, the dark, loud noises, strangers. Are you still a stranger?”

Qi Zhao shook his head. “Not anymore.”

Afu nodded and turned to the girls. “Are you strangers too?”

Qi Ruoyu looked startled, then shook her head.

Qi Ruolan shook hers at once.

Satisfied, Afu turned back to me. “Mother, they’re not strangers. I don’t have to be scared now.”

I had nothing to say to that.

Taoxi laughed aloud.

Qi Ruolan couldn’t help asking, “Why does that mean he doesn’t have to be scared?”

“Our Afu has a rule,” Taoxi explained. “Once he’s met you, you’re not a stranger, so there’s nothing to be afraid of.”

Qi Ruolan’s eyes lit up again. “Then he’s our little brother now?”

Taoxi looked at me.

I nodded.

Qi Ruolan seized Afu’s hand. “Come on, come on! I’ll show you where we play! There’s a swing in our courtyard!”

She’d pulled him a few steps along when he turned back and called to Qi Zhao, who was still standing where he’d been. “Are you coming?”

Qi Zhao stared, then looked at me, then at Afu, then at his sisters.

“Go on,” Qi Ruoyu said gently. “I’m coming too.”

He hesitated, then slowly followed.

Watching the four children go, I remembered something.

“Taoxi, what’s going on with Zhao’s clothes?”

She’d noticed too. “The sleeves are short. I think he’s outgrown them.”

“Find out who had them made and when. See what else he’s short of in his rooms, and make sure he gets everything he needs.”

Taoxi answered and went off.

I stood in the courtyard, watching the children disappear into the distance.

Afu’s clear laughter carried back to me.

Perhaps this household wasn’t so frightening after all.