The Swindler and the False God - Chapter 6

Chapter 6

I couldn’t sleep.

It was humiliating.

As a con artist, I’d seen far too many men fall for someone.

Some were impatient. Some were filthy. Some thought themselves deeply devoted.

Xize’s kind was the most troublesome.

He barely did anything at all.

Just one sentence, one pause, one touch that never failed to land.

And yet it could keep a person thinking about it all night.

The next day, I took the Deception Manual to the Relief Hall.

Xize had me break down the tricks for the people who had been deceived.

The first household was Masha’s neighbor.

She held a skinny little boy in her arms, and the look in her eyes said she wanted to carve me open.

I took the wooden whistle apart.

“The sound came from here.”

Through her tears, the woman asked, “So her daughter didn’t come back?”

I said, “No.”

She raised her hand and slapped me across the face.

Smack.

It was loud.

Xize stood beside me. He didn’t stop her.

I wiped the blood from the corner of my mouth.

“Anything else you want to ask?”

The woman sobbed until she crouched down.

The boy wrapped his arms around her.

I stood there, and all of a sudden, I felt ridiculous.

I used to always say people were willing to be fooled because they were greedy.

Greedy for the dead to return.

Greedy for the sick to recover.

Greedy for God to open one narrow crack for the poor.

But now, looking at them, I realized they were just in too much pain.

In so much pain that they were willing to spend their last two silver coins to buy one false word: Mama.

At dusk, when we returned to the White Tower, I didn’t say a word.

Neither did Xize.

When we reached the end of the corridor, I stopped.

“Are you satisfied now?”

He looked at me.

“No.”

“Didn’t you want to see whether I’d gone rotten all the way through?”

“Now I’ve seen it.”

“And then?”

My smile was ugly.

“Is the Lord Saint going to purify me?”

Xize took a step closer.

“Do you want to be purified?”

“No.”

“Then I won’t.”

I stared at him.

“What exactly do you want?”

He looked at me for a long time.

“I want you to stop treating yourself like a pile of filth.”

His words were very soft.

So soft my chest suddenly ached.

I hated that kind of pain.

It made me lose control even more than desire did.

I reached out, grabbed his collar, and yanked him down.

“Xize.”

It was the first time I’d called him by his name.

His breath stopped for an instant.

I leaned in close.

“Do you know what con artists are best at?”

“What?”

“Acting out whatever someone else wants to see.”

His gaze fell to my lips, then quickly moved away.

“Then what do you think I want?”

“Me.”

The corridor was very quiet.

In the distance, the evening bell rang.

Xize raised his hand and wrapped it around my wrist.

This time, he didn’t pull away immediately.

His thumb pressed against my pulse.

I could feel my own heartbeat.

I could also feel the heat of his hand.

“Miya,” he said.

“If what I truly want is you, can you afford to deceive me?”