The Tyrant's Silly Tuntun - Chapter 3

From then on, I became the Tyrant’s personal head palace maid.

No matter where the Tyrant went, he brought me with him. Morning court, the privy, bed, meals.

As a result, I rose earlier than the roosters and slept later than the oxen. Day after day, my mind was worn to a thread.

Rumor in the palace had it that the reason the Tyrant never favored the ladies of the harem was because I had cast some wicked spell on him, keeping him hooked day and night until he had no time to spare.

“Your Majesty, Lady Consort Su is here.”

Li Sheng, the chief eunuch at the Tyrant’s side, walked into the hall and, without forgetting, slipped two bright red fruits into my hand on the way.

I was grinding ink for the Tyrant, but I was honestly too sleepy, so my chin kept bobbing lower and lower.

Still, I tucked the fruits into my sleeve pocket out of habit.

In the past, whenever I dozed off, Eunuch Li would break out in a cold sweat, terrified that the Tyrant might suddenly lose his mind and run me through with a sword.

But later, he discovered that not only did the Tyrant not get angry, he would even very considerately yawn along with me, drag me over to the stool beside him, and thoughtfully cover me with a blanket.

Li Sheng was delighted to realize that the Tyrant treated me differently.

So, in the spirit of loving the house and its crow, Li Sheng spent every day thinking up new ways to prepare tasty food and drinks for me. He was even more attentive to me than the Tyrant was.

When Consort Su came in, a sharp, choking fragrance hit me right in the face.

I could not hold it in. I sneezed, muttered, “So strong,” then lowered my head and drifted off again.

Consort Su flew into a rage. In her delicate, fragile way, she ran to the Tyrant’s side, not forgetting to shove me hard out of the way before throwing herself into his arms and sobbing.

“Your Majesty, how can this palace maid have so little sense of propriety? I specially wore Your Majesty’s favorite perfume to come see you, yet she actually complains that I smell too strong. I don’t care. Your Majesty has to uphold justice for me.”

I tilted my head and looked at Consort Su, finding it all rather unbelievable.

She looked as if a breeze could knock her over, so how was she so strong when she shoved people? She had pushed me so hard my waist hurt.

I found a pillar to lean against and prepared to sleep again.

Then I saw the Tyrant over there, his expression deeply displeased as he rubbed his waist. His nose twitched several times before he let out a fierce sneeze, then frowned and said,

“Don’t wear that next time. I nearly threw up.”

The Tyrant had always been harsh with his words. Consort Su’s face immediately went pale, and she stormed out in a huff.

When she passed by me, she did not forget to glare at me viciously and snap,

“You just wait.”

I gave a blank “Oh,” not really understanding what she meant.

The one who said he nearly threw up was the Tyrant. What did it have to do with me?

Sleepiness swept over me, and I leaned against the pillar and dozed off again.