Why Do the Demon King and the Sword Venerable Look Alike? - Chapter 5

I shamelessly hounded Lan Xiao, begging him to take me as his disciple.

“Please, please accept me as your disciple!”

This was already the sixth time this month I’d knelt outside his door and begged him to take me in.

Lan Xiao finally acknowledged me. “Why are you so determined to make me your master? That brat Chu Huarong’s cultivation is passable. He’s more than capable of teaching you.”

“What Your Excellency the Sword Venerable doesn’t understand is that the Temple Master is a conservative, while I’m a radical. Our beliefs are fundamentally incompatible.”

That was only one reason. The other was

that he thought I was a hopeless nepo baby who would go home sooner or later. If I failed to learn properly, I would ruin his reputation in the Taoist education world.

“How so?”

“The Temple Master believes humans and demons are at peace, and that the Demon King governs his people well. He told me not to attack the Demon King and shatter the peace between our races.”

Lan Xiao sneered. “That’s because he can’t beat the Demon King.”

I nodded and fawned, “Exactly! He obviously can’t beat the Demon King, yet he still refuses to teach me with everything he has. If I study under him, how can I ever defeat the Demon King? If I’m going to choose a master, I should choose the strongest!”

Lan Xiao lowered his gaze to me. “Then why do you want to attack the Demon King?”

I could tell at once that his heart was softening again.

“Because he’s the strongest of all demons. Once I defeat him, I’ll be the strongest Taoist priest in human history—an overnight rise to fame, with my name immortalized forever!”

I chuckled. “Then we’ll be the foremost sword cultivator and the foremost Taoist priest in history.”

Lan Xiao sounded doubtful. “We?”

I nodded like a chicken pecking rice. “Yes, yes. We.”

Lan Xiao smiled. “I can teach you, but—”

Quick as lightning, I dropped to my knees. “Master!”

Before my knees touched the ground, Lan Xiao hauled me back up.

“I won’t remain here long. I don’t want to delay you from finding your next distinguished teacher, so I won’t become your master. I’ll only teach you.”

“…Huh?”

“Where are you going?”

“That has nothing to do with you.”

Lan Xiao gave me a secret voice-transmission seal so I could contact him.

On my way back, I saw Zuo Xu standing to one side, staring fixedly at me.

“Good morning, First Senior Brother.”

Zuo Xu lowered his eyes. “Did Grandmaster agree to take you as his disciple?”

“No, but he did agree to become my good friend.”

Zuo Xu seemed to awaken some deeply repressed, ghostly stalker tendencies.

He did nothing all day except follow Lan Xiao around.

Seeing him so insecure, I encouraged him. “Go for it, Senior Brother. His Excellency the Sword Venerable acts tough, but he’s softhearted. If you seek him out, he’ll definitely pay attention to you too.”

“Is that true…?”

“Yes, yes. You just have to keep pestering him.”

Zuo Xu looked utterly dejected. “No, forget it… You wouldn’t understand…”

All right, then.

His Excellency the Sword Venerable really was busy.

He really was an excellent teacher, too.

Under his instruction, my skills improved by leaps and bounds.

Lan Xiao said, “Remember this well: One stroke of the sword brings frost to the Fourteen Provinces. Two strokes bring frost to Laba porridge. Three strokes bring frost to millet porridge. Four strokes bring frost to seafood porridge. Five strokes bring frost to century-egg and pork porridge. Six strokes bring frost to slow-braised beef porridge. Seven strokes bring frost to pork-rib and mushroom porridge. Eight strokes bring frost to yam and vegetable porridge. Nine strokes bring frost to milk-and-oat porridge. The tenth sword is the sole criterion for testing truth.”

Got it. I remembered.

Every morning, I cooked porridge for him.

After three months of cultivation,

I accepted a solo combat mission to kill a fish demon.

The fish demon whipped up storms and waves and loved capsizing passing boats.

On the bank of the Baishui River, I chased it around and stabbed at it with a huge iron sword.

But the fish was far too slippery.

The Baishui River was also much too wide, which put me at a disadvantage.

We fought for four or five days.

At last, my iron sword rusted.

Seeing that my weapon was ruined, the fish demon surged forward and lashed out with its tail.

I grabbed its slippery tail and was dragged into the water.

The fish demon wrapped itself tightly around my waist. “Keh-heh-heh! Why did they send such a weak Taoist priest?”

Not only was this fish hideously ugly,

it was shameless, too. Where had all that talk been when I was stabbing it and sending it fleeing in every direction?

It held me too tightly for me to exert any strength. I was slowly suffocating.

I had no choice but to send Lan Xiao a voice transmission asking for help.

“Gurgle… Your Excellency… gurgle… save me…”

Lan Xiao replied instantly, “Wait there.”

The next second, the fish demon released me and fled at the speed of light.

I swam awkwardly to shore and coughed violently.

Snow-white boots entered my vision. Above them was a pair of long, straight legs.

I looked up, laughing between coughs. “Your Excellency arrived so quickly.”

“Where is the demon?”

“It sensed your presence and ran away. Your Excellency is incredible.”

“Enough. How can you fail to beat a single fish?”

I sat up cross-legged, a little embarrassed.

“My training is inadequate. I need more practice… Now hurry and catch that fish, Your Excellency. I want grilled fish!”

Lan Xiao looked down at me, a faint chill in his eyes.

“Beg me.”

I became lost in his gaze, my heart pounding wildly.

Damn it. This was all his fault for being so handsome.

“Please, please, please.”

“Very good. Not only are you pathetically weak, you have no backbone. I’d love to know what you plan to use against the Demon King.”

I made a heart with my hands. “I’ll reform him with love.”

“Hey, hey, hey! Don’t leave, Your Excellency!”

I scrambled up and grabbed the hem of his robe.

Lan Xiao looked back with a sneer. “You can reform the fish with love, too.”

“I was wrong. I was wrong.”

I had no idea what I’d done wrong, but apologizing first was never a mistake.

“Don’t call me next time.”

“All right.”

Heheh. I’d call him next time, too.

Lan Xiao drew his ebony sword. In an instant, bitter cold froze heaven and earth.

The fish demon crashed heavily onto the shore, its gaze full of terror as it looked at Lan Xiao.

Cold light flashed. It reverted to its original form—a mandarin fish.

“Extra chili and cumin!”

Lan Xiao chopped firewood, lit a fire, and grilled the fish in one smooth, practiced sequence.

I held the grilled fish in both hands and ate until grease covered my mouth.